"C" for Compromise?? Nahh

There has been one common topic of discussion between me and my girlfriends the last few months- relationships. With some of us being on the brim of marriage and committments and the rest of us harbouring around that thin line where we all know soon enough we'll be on the other side, this has been one unavoidable topic. And somewhere down the last few conversations, I started feeling this fear. The fear of the unknown- of the future, which I've tried to keep at a far distance up until now. Coming from a country where the role of the man and woman is clearly defined- where the line is straight and the man is the unemotional breadearner and the woman a demure household figure, I feel I probably do not fit straight into that mould. And there are thousands like me, who probably don't and are just as scared as me to say so.

When people discuss marriage they talk of compromise- why can't we talk about a beautiful committment? Thats what a marriage will mean to me. And if you have to compromise just to get by the relationship, why be in it? Why put yourself through the grief? I know all these questions probably come to my mind because I am a fiercely independent person. I do need people, but not to get by, I need them because I love them and every single relationship- be it family or friends is special to me. I share a unique bond with every person, and I would like to believe that none of those relationships are based on a compromise. So why should marriage be based on a compromise? If two people are choosing to live their lives together, then thats no compromise, thats by choice. And if you've reached a stage where you've decided to live together, I'm sure you've worked the logistics out before you reach that decision? So where does the compromise fit in?

My best friends always tell me that when I'm in a situation where I have to choose between the man I love and the other insignificant things I have to give up to be with him, I'll will compromise. But my point is, what is this compromise nonsense? And why can't we all be practical? I believe we all need to make adjustments. When I left home for the first time, it was a hell of an adjustment, to find your feet in a new country, to do every little thing and most importantly look after yourself. But that wasn't a compromise- that was an adjustment, to a different culture. So when I get married it will be an adjustment which me and my partner will make and thats fine. But none of us will compromise, because you can't live life on a compromise. I despise the very word!

Every marriage is beautiful, and if only we can all believe that, we'll get through life as a bliss. Relationships can be complicated, but they are fulfilling. And coming from a country where the institution of marriage still holds a great amount of value, I would love to believe that it will be the best committment life will ahve to offer. From my perspective, marriage is about understanding and not compromising, its about emotion and not ego, its about all those lovely things that every girl dreams of and most importantly it is about that one prince!